I have always had mixed feelings about the terrible way that Apple treats their iPhone customers. Full-price locked devices; an exclusive agreement with an awful carrier that requires a multi-year contract; a completely closed platform. On the other hand, it was the most pleasant-to-use mobile phone I’ve ever owned, the devices became trivially unlockable, and thus AT&T avoidable.
By buying the hardware but avoiding AT&T (and the juicy subscriber revenue that gets passed along to Apple), I reasoned, I can reward them for making a good device, but punish them for the attempted lock-in. I could sleep at night.
And since I no longer live in a country with third-world mobile phone infrastructure — the United States — I have been eagerly and vocally anticipating the launch of the 3G iPhone since December.
Until, that is, the actual launch.
Last week’s keynote was, sadly, the most content-free Apple presentation I’ve ever seen:
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they mentioned the new operating system update only in passing, which leads me to believe that it will be forgettably incremental.
Of course, they’ll still charge me the same incremental $80…
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they spent a disproportionate amount of time announcing enterprise calendar/mail syncing that catches up with what Microsoft and RIM had ten years ago — and Apple has the balls to charge $100pa for it.
A survey of my friends indicates that 100% of them would like that functionality, but that 0% of them think it’s good value, or plan to pay.
Especially Blackberry users, accustomed to getting this for free (or at any rate, silently built into the cost of their mobile plan)
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they spent almost an hour going through a seemingly endless litany of snoozer third-party applications en route to the iPhone. Two people in the audience were rushed to UCSF Medical Center with critical, boredom-related injuries.
Like the Simpsons episodes that feature 30-second audio loops, this was transparent code for “we have absolutely nothing to announce, not even an iMac refresh, so we’re filling time with this garbage. Please short our stock.”
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instead of giving developers what they asked for — the ability to run background apps on the iPhone — they gave them another Apple lock-in, a service that stores and forwards data packets.
All of it underscored by the fact that Steve was off-stage most of the time, and I don’t blame him. I wouldn’t want to be the public face of that detritus either. There are also rumours about his cancer, but he was there; even if true, I don’t really think that was the issue.
If it weren’t for the announcement of the 3G iPhone, available in something like 70 countries, it would have been a total flop. There would have been riots at the Moscone Center.
But even that announcement comes with hidden poisonous spikes, already oozing thick venom. They’ve scrapped their old revenue-sharing plan with AT&T (though not the exclusivity) in favour of the traditional subsidized-phone model with which carriers are familiar — almost certainly the key to the new worldwide distribution.
In doing so, they’ve apparently decided not to sell unsubsidized phones at all. You won’t be able to buy an iPhone online. They won’t let you walk out of an Apple or AT&T store until you’ve activated iPhone — ie, signed a contract, and agreed to their ridiculous Terms, which you’d violate by unlocking your phone or installing unsupported third-party software. Things people actually want to do with their expensive hardware.
One analyst estimates that as many as thirty percent of first-gen iPhones were unlocked just to avoid using AT&T. Countless more were jailbroken to install third-party software.
So it was a year of retrenched Apple lock-in from start to finish, from the data “service”, to new iPhone distribution terms, the closed developer tools, and “only if Apple approves” iPhone software platform.
It’s such a disaster that I probably won’t get a 3G iPhone after all, despite my longing. We’ll see what the terms are like in Australia, where Optus and Vodafone are selling it. But I think I’m finished supporting this deplorable business model, just as I no longer buy music from the money vacuum.